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Creating a fantasy. This IS the hardest part of our jobs as strippers... and the best part about it is that %80 of our success depends on our ability to do it.
There are many many girls out there who completely ignore this crucial factor of their job, in fact I would say the large majority of girls fall into this category. A small percentage actually take it into consideration and are able to leverage it into sales, and an even smaller - perhaps miniscule - percentage actually really look into Male psychology to find out an in-depth analysis of what the typical male fantasy IS.
The best place to look towards when trying to understand the psychology of the male fantasy is the science of socio-biology. To put it in basic terms, this is the science of how sex has influenced our social behaviors and gender differences. Men see the world in such a different way than women do it's hard to understand how we ever get along, but we are genetically designed to do so despite our differences! We as women however, MUST respect the differences in the psychology of the opposite gender if we EVER hope to be able to appeal to them.
That being said, girls who focus on sales are doing so at the great risk of degrading their fantasy value. What they fail to realize is that they ARE the product that they are trying to sell, and instead of enhancing the quality of their product according to customer preferences, they focus on SELLING the product. Now I would say that the ability to say the right things to make a sale is going to account for %20 of your success. I mean, even if you say all the right things, if your product doesn't meet the criteria set forth by the average male fantasy, you aren't going to get anywhere. If fact, sometimes "saying all the right things to make a sale" is working AGAINST the fantasy. No one wants to be "sold" something and by focusing on the sale you are bringing attention to it.
Like I said YOU are the product... YOUR ACT is the product - and if your act is based on "selling" then who is going to want to buy that act? If your "act" however is based on being a sex-driven, fun-to-be-around, beautiful young woman.... well I think you'll be a lot more successful with the gents! Just like anything though, it's never black and white. If you focus on psychology without a bit of sales know how, you aren't going to be able to close anything! It's a delicate mind game that you will have to play with yourself as to the portion of sales technique that you actually apply to be able to keep the fantasy alive without taking away your ability to make a sale. But, please remember to not let dry sales technique take over your "Hustle" otherwise you will be degrading your fantasy value.
The fantasy girl that we must learn to portray as strippers is often times not true to our core selves, but we must learn to over come the nagging in our head to be "authentic" and learn to ACT. There are tricks and techniques to use that will help you out on this, but acting is the most crucial part of your performance. Once a guy feels that you are taking the piss with him, it could be all over. Your job is to learn how to deal with this, how to recover from your slips as quickly and quietly as possible.
Stage magic actually offers some of the BEST techniques for being able to create the illusion of reality. It teaches you how to direct attention which is probably the best way to cover up sales technique! The best trick that stage magic teaches though is to make yourself believe that what you are trying to make look real ACTUALLY IS real. I'll write a blog on how to do this at some other time.
Men consciously KNOW that we are there to make money but subconsciously their minds are FILLED with the possibility of taking us home. Even though they know and accept that what we are saying could be BS their subconscious wants it so badly to NOT be BS that they will fall for our "sincerity". Even though they want to believe it, they also want to "know" that it's real... which will cause them to try and test you. Yes, THEY WILL TEST YOUR SINCERITY. But the best thing to do is to never EVER let them think / focus on the fact that you are manipulating them for money.
Once again, the MOST important thing about stripping is the fantasy, for the fantasy IS the product. The second most important thing is knowing HOW to sell that fantasy without ruining it!
So the main steps to creating fantasy:
1. Do research as to what the male fantasy is
2. Don't let sales technique degrade your "act"
3. Learn how to act to make fantasy reality.
4. Learn how to control attention to cover up sales technique and slip-ups.
I'll try my best to go into these further in future posts, but for now, try and figure out how to do as much of this on your own as you can : ) good luck!
Before you begin....
First of all welcome to my blog! Let me tell you a bit about myself and how this all began...
It all started when I went through a bout of depression where I questioned my intellect. One of the hardest things to go through is to honestly think that you're stupid.
Eventually I realized, however, that it was not me that was intellectually challenged, but the world around me that told me that I was because I see things "differently" (in other words, ways that most people don't have the ability to understand!). It turned out that I'm extremely philosophical and bright and I have an ability to become extremely good at whatever I have the motivation to learn! Yay!
So to find happiness I began one of the deepest searches one can take on in their lives: The Search for Enlightenment. What I found was that there are different paths to the peak of all mountains, but to truly know the way up a mountain you must first know all the paths to be able to find the one that will lead you where you want to go. This was my template for success: to simply learn and to keep my mind open no matter what.
Hence, I practice a form of Integralism in which there is no wrong answer, only answers that will lead you closer to the full truth and answers that will limit the truth.
It's my belief that to say there is only one right answer it like saying that there is only one path up the mountain... it's dangerously misleading.
As a professional exotic dancer it is my goal to apply this wisdom to my chosen profession as a way of fully exploring means of generating revenue. To use everything from biology to psychology to sociology to sales to become the "Ultimate Fantasy Girl" who is able to rob men blind! : )... The Ultimate Stripper if you will...
Sometimes, you may find what I say here hard to understand if you are used to the average "sales book" that most women in my profession rely on to learn The Hustle. It's my personal opinion that to rely on a sales tactic alone is highly misdirected for men do not come to strip-clubs to BUY something, they come to enjoy a fantasy. And while there are many sales tricks and tactics that can be used to increase your effectiveness, to count on them without respect for the deeper psychological processes involved in the relation between you and your customers is highly naive and doesn't implement a full range of effectiveness.
What you will read in this blog is mostly based on psychology, and can sometimes be philosophical and / or theoretical. However, it is the philosophy of stripping that will lead you to the deeper understanding that will spell out your success. Not all tricks and techniques will work for everyone but, a greater understanding of the craft and it's underlying psychology WILL.... as long as you can grasp it. It will then be up to you to apply the knowledge to the best of your ability, which WILL require creativity on your part to be able to match your personality with the intricacies of being a "fantasy girl"
It is not my place to call myself an expert, instead I feel the term "scientific observer" perhaps is more appropriate. I simply ask questions and seek answers. However, with the amounts of questions that I have asked and the amounts of answers that I have collected over the past two years on the subject of stripping has begun to take shape. It has begun to make more and more sense as a full picture of the art form has started to develop.
It's like all the little questions I've asked over time were like pieces to a giant puzzle. From the questions on the source of happiness and misery to the questions on what to say to a guy when he asks for your number at work, they have all added up to this picture of the "ultimate" dancer. How she knows mens weaknesses, how she knows just what to say to play up what she wants you to think and play down what she doesn't want you to think about, and how she can rob almost ANY man who enters her web blind.
These blogs are the first steps of cataloging this picture and while many details are yet to emerge, it is my goal to describe the foundations and principles of my findings thus far.
It is important that you realize that my goal here is to catalog the ways to MAKE MONEY. It's not about "being yourself" or "being a good person" Often times I will suggest things quite contradictory to popular ethics. You can judge and disagree all you want, but the techniques I have outlined here WORK when it comes to making money. If it is more important to you to "be honest" or "be a good person" than it is to make money than this blog IS NOT FOR YOU.
If you have any questions by all means please feel free to ask. It's my philosophy that questions are the beginnings of enlightenment, so please, enlighten yourself! And by all means, keep searching for answers elsewhere... for the more places you look, the more comprehensive your vision will be : )
Thanks for reading.
<3 Princess Paris
Friday, August 1, 2008
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1 comment:
Hey- I love your blog- everything you've written is so helpful! Thanks!!
-gypsy
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